This Monday Huddle is one you DO NOT want to miss!
Watch below, or read the transcript beneath the video.
Opening
First, I Just want to say thank you for having me on today. It’s a pleasure to be here.
To give you a brief background about myself I’m 27 and have lived most of my young life feeling inadequate. I grew up like most black boys with a single mother who did everything possible to make sure my life was one of prosperity and opportunity.
We were poor and I lost my father when I was a young boy. That forced me to mature quicker and I lost out on seeing what being a man meant in this world. I missed out on a having a good male role model at home. I missed out on things I’ll never be able to experience or get back. Now, my dad was bi-racial and lived a very hard life because of it.
There is a whole side of my family I know nothing about due to racism. I grew up going to an all-white Christian school when he was alive and there I experienced what opportunity looked like. What privilege looked like. My parents spent every dime they had on a good education for me when my dad was alive. When he died I ended up going to an all-black school in a small town in South Carolina that had bullet holes in the cafeteria doors where there was a shootout. The food was about as unhealthy as you can get. The kids were not challenged and my reading level was so high compared to my peers, I was often bored to death. My little sister would cry every single day going to that school. That school had no funding and couldn’t afford teachers. We had no resources and when I looked around me I saw nothing to aspire to. I didn’t see role models. I saw everything I didn’t want to become.
Fast forward a bit and we moved and I went to a school that had diversity, funding, and resources. There you could find opportunity but if you didn’t have the right white connections your odds of being successful were quite low. Fortunately for me, I always sought mentorship. I was never afraid to ask for help. I always wanted fulfillment, a sense of freedom, and significance. I worked hard to build a good reputation for myself but no matter what I did for myself, I always needed someone white to get from point A to point B. At a young age, I learned through experience that being black meant that before people got to know me for me, they saw the color of my skin and immediately formed their own opinion of me. Instead of me trying to make a good first impression, my job was to combat their preconceived, stereotypical perception of me. Whether you call it implicit bias or not, people judge you first on what you look like, second on where you’re from, third on how you speak, and fourth on your merit.
How Has George Floyd’s Death Affected You?
George Floyd’s death is another reminder that equality has never existed in this Country. What I see on the news and on social media is black people get murdered and the people behind it suffering little to no consequences. I see black people put behind bars for carrying a bag of weed and white people suspended from their job for murdering someone.
Laws do not change hearts and a system that was never built for my success will not be broken by violence. There is a wildfire in this Country that needs to be extinguished. When I hear someone say I do not see color I feel they are really saying I refuse to acknowledge the racism and discrimination around me. Privilege is when you think something is not a problem because it’s not a problem for you personally. I could ask 100 black people to tell me about a time when they were racially profiled and 97 of them will have several stories to tell. We have to start treating everyone with love, dignity, and respect. We have to see color as it is and embrace our differences. Diversity is a beautiful thing that we have yet to experience fully in all of its greatness.
What Do You Want White People to Know About Black Experiences?
You know I have been asked by several white people about the black American experience and I’ll take a moment to share two brief stories with you. The world I live in is so drastically different than the world a white person lives in. I was pulled over for no reason in Dallas, Texas in 2011. I was the driver and I had 2 friends with me. It was about 2 am in the morning and I was literally 30 seconds away from our hotel. We had just driven, Idk, 17 hours. The police officer pulled me over and I could see in my side view mirror that his hand was firmly planted on his gun as he approached the vehicle slowly while his flashlight beamed brightly through the back window of my car. He came to my window and rudely said what are you boys doing here? I answered and said I was there for a trumpet lesson later that morning. He then said yea right and asked to see all three of our driver licenses as he flashed the flashlight all around the vehicle like he was searching for something. He looked at our licenses right there and said so you boys are from Georgia and you came all this way just for a music lesson. I said yes. He then went to the car and sat there for what felt like forever before he gave us our licenses back and said I’ll be watching you. Even more recent, last year my wife was arrested and taken to jail on her way to work. My wife is a nurse and had her uniform on. I got a call at about 7:30 am or so from an unknown number. I answered and my wife was crying profusely. I could barely understand what she was saying but she told that I needed to get her out and I said where. Where are you? She then told me that she was in jail. To make a long story short, my wife was racially profiled. The officer pulled my wife over and was very rude, approached her car as if she was a threat and arrested my wife within minutes of pulling her over saying the reason was for driving without insurance which we did have insurance and we could prove it. After he threw my wife in the back of his police truck, he then searched my wife’s vehicle for drugs. Now I am no law enforcement expert but if you pull someone over and say I’m pulling you over for lack of insurance why would you need to search their work bag, purse, car, and trunk? Luckily, I knew the right white people to get everything squared away but that officer is still out there to this day racially profiling people. Imagine if I didn’t have the connections I have. Imagine what would have happened if I didn’t call upon my white mentor for help. Think about my wife’s career at that point. My wife could have been one white contact away from being another Sandra Bland. I’m one white contact away from being an Ahmaud Arbery. I’m afraid to live in this country because justice seems to not exist for black people. We fill the cells of prisons across the country for petty things but a white man can murder you and suffer no consequence. Black kids today are seeing people that look just like them be murdered on national television. They are seeing our justice system fail us. You learn who people are by what they do, not by what they say and kids today our witnessing a system that is supposed to be of the people, by the people, and for the people work only to the benefit of white people.
Where Do We Go From Here?
There is an opportunity here, however. There is hope and promise in the chaos. We have the opportunity right now to take bold action that will impact society for generations to come. Let this time be the wrinkle in history that we open our eyes and correct the injustices of our country. Let us come together and love one another. Let us remember what John 15:12 tells us. It says, “This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.” And how did Jesus love us? UNCONDITIONALLY. How can you love someone you do not know. We need our white brothers and sisters more now than ever to stand with us against hate, bigotry, and systematic discrimination and all that has plagued this world since Man’s fall in the Garden of Eden. There needs to be a War on Racism. We are better than this. We can do better than this. All people need to be deliberate about supporting and loving one another. Embracing one another. Let’s be deliberate about first seeking to understand what is being said and then seek to be understood second. My challenge for our Nation is to begin to have meaningful conversations that yield a plan of action that rights wrongs and breaks barriers. Black people can not win this war alone. We need support. We need to know that you are on our side. We need to know that you care. WE NEED JUSTICE. The band aids we keep putting on internal issues in this Country are and will always be temporary. That’s why we keep having these things happen. We have to fix the problem causing us to need a band aid in the first place. I’ll end my rant the way we started by saying,
“The sea is dangerous and its storms terrible, but these obstacles have never been sufficient reason to remain ashore... Unlike the mediocre, intrepid spirits seek victory over those things that seem impossible... It is with an iron will that they embark on the most daring of all endeavors... to meet the shadowy future without fear and conquer the unknown.”
Now is the time to boldly stand together and relentlessly fight for change.
Thomas Grant: Kristoff. Powerful stories. Can you reflect on the differences between the three kinds of schools you attended … Mostly white Christian schools, poor all-black public schools and diverse schools. How did they shape you? And shape you differently?
All-White Christian School – This school gave me a great foundation to learn and grow. They groomed us to be critical thinkers that served our communities with purpose. They instilled confidence in us. They challenged us to be students of life. It is here, during the crucial stages of my young life, I developed the crucial intangible skills necessary to be successful in life. Poor, All-Black Public School – Limited resources, poor staffing, and limited exposure plagued the school. I wasn’t challenged nor were there opportunities available to aspire to become anything better than the poor environment you were surrounded with daily. It was difficult to see myself outside of where I was – nothing or anyone to look up to. I was bored and unchallenged. My perception of what I could become in this world was very limited. Diverse Public School – Community support, plenty of resources, and opportunities abound. I learned that one of the keys to success was being able to empathize with, work with, and understand “people”. There is no one size fits all. I utilized the resources around me and challenged myself to grow. Unfortunately, the only kids that looked like me that reaped the reward of the resources available were those that had initiative and an innate drive to live life fully and master their own strengths. I sought mentorship constantly. If it had not been for my own individual desire to “go out there and get it”, I fear I would not have been successful here. Most kids need help finding that inner drive.
Melinda Davis: What concrete steps/actions can I take to help?
We all can be facilitators of change. Showing up is 90% of the battle. Focus less on knowing what to say or how to feel or what “exactly” to do. More of our attention should be towards understanding the “big picture” problem, having empathy, and showing up to do what is necessary to help promote meaningful conversations that foster change. Find members of your community that are working towards that change and show up ready to get your hands dirty. And bring people with you! There is power in number. Show up, help facilitate discussion, and be one to always ask the question – “Okay, what is the solution for our community? How can we right wrongs here?” I think it’s a little different for each community, but we have to stand together on this.
Davontae Hunt: What’s your opinion of the “approach” protestors have taken in response to this global out cry? Other than unanimous collaboration, what individual practices can a person do to add to the meaning of the protest we’re seeing?
Protestors should continue to assemble together and make their woes known as they have been peacefully. I do want to point out that most protests are peaceful and there are organizations and people out there trying to jeopardize the good that peaceful protestors are trying to do by changing the narrative. Now, to answer your question, protestors should engage in discussions and come up with well-thought out solutions and plans of action for their respective communities. Voting does not fix problems. Electing one or two decent officials won’t change the system. We all need to come together as one in all of our communities and create the plan our politicians need to follow. They are supposed to be the voice of the people. Let’s take the mic back and give them concrete action steps to take. If they refuse to make the positive change the community as a whole has come up with, petition their resignation and get someone in there that will actually represent “the people” not the few with money/power.
Claire Driscoll: Thank you for sharing your experiences. Which organizations are you recommending that others support financially in order to impact this incredibly necessary reform?
Find organizations like Mission 3E that are working to develop the next generation of leaders who are able to critical think and solve some of the major issues we have today. The future rests in the hands of our young people today. Young people right now have the ability to destroy a corrupt system and build one that works for everyone. Not just some of us.
Twig McGlynn: What do you think of President Trump’s statements?
At the end of the day, we all want to feel wanted, loved, appreciated, accepted, and understood. President Trump, in my humble opinion, lacks the empathy to lead us out of a divisive race war that has been plaguing our society since its formation. I respect the President and the office, but I do not agree with the way he has handled much of the division in our Country. We need unity and justice and peace. Our nation should be grieving together right now and coming up with a plan of action – not fighting one another. We are only as strong as our weakest links. How can America be great divided?